It came in the night, on sneaky, sickly feet. First, it was a very full feeling tummy. A rumbling. An uncomfortableness that wouldn't cease. There was an impending sense of doom.
Then, at 3am, the icky stuff began. I won't go into details, except to say that something happened to me that has never happened to me before: I passed out while throwing up. One minute, I was on my knees in the bathroom, and the next, my head was resting against the tub on the floor.
Either I feel asleep in literally 01 seconds, which might have been possible since I was super tired at that point, but I can think of about a million better places to take a nap that snuggled between the toilet and tub. I woke up with just enough time to make it to my knees again. Awesome sauce.
In the early dawn hours, I finally settled onto the couch to finish reading "Slammed" by Colleen Hoover, who is a self publishing marvel. The premise was great, and I would absolutely recommend it to anyone who loves YA romances. If you have a teenage daughter, she will LOVE Slammed.
After I finished the book, I laid in both the bed and the bathroom feeling sorry for myself for about, oh 3 hours, and then I moved downstairs to the couch. Ryan was so sweet to take care of me. He brought Gatorade and crackers and set up a bed for me. Then he then Lysol-ed everything I touched. I settled in for a long day going between the couch and the bathroom. Luckily, we had a couple of movies on our shelf that we've borrowed from friends and never seen.
"There Will Be Blood" was one of them. So we watched it. MOST. DEPRESSING. MOVIE. EVER. Thanks a lot Powers family! If I didn't feel terrible already, then watching a terrible father make terrible mistakes all while covered in oil made me feel ten times worse. There Will Be Blood was one of those arty films that everyone talked about, and then I watch it and feel totally stupid that I didn't "get it". I mean, I get it. The spiritual symbolism was crystal clear. The acting was phenomenal, yes.
The movie just made me want to set myself on fire a little, that's all.
After that, I laid in bed for about three hours feeling sorry for myself again - it's the one good thing about having a nasty flu, it allows you to feel sorry for yourself and no one can tell you that you're wrong. You are allowed about 24 hours of self-pity for no reason. If only you felt better, you could truly enjoy it this window of self-pity. Instead, you are trying to think of everything BUT your stomach.
I slept. I did other flu-related gross things. Then I came downstairs and tried to take some chicken noodle soup. No go. My second movie of the day was Hairspray. That movie has some great one-liners. I slept through most of it, and then caught up with what was happening in the Elly in Bloom world. Elly in Bloom has done really great this week. We are at 142 reviews and counting, and this week Elly cracked the top 1000 in fiction, in both Women's and Contemporary Fiction. Hooray! Book sales grow over time, and so I'm excited to see where it goes.
I would say I'm living the dream, but it's hard to say that when you are bent over a toilet regretting the large helping of broccoli you had the night before.
Right now, I'm watching Equilibrium, which is one of my favorite Christian Bale movies, where he says things like "If I was going to shoot you, I'd shoot you in the face!" all while wearing some amazing black clerical and acting like Neo, only without emotion and the flying. It's pretty fantastic. He was Batman BEFORE he was Batman, you know? It's all about a society in which expressing emotion is forbidden. I would die in that society in a day.
Uhhh...what? Disregard this entire blog. Crazy flu thoughts.